Word of the Week - POFLOALARAOTFPSFAA

Every once in a while a story comes along that causes a sensation. OUaV was one, and then there's A Child is Born.

Apparently, it was causing quite a fuss on Twitter last night, and one of the Lambs passed along the link for us to peruse (at least, those of us who would).

Me? I'd rather not read it because it sounds far more thrilling coming to me secondhand via the Lambs who are reading it. It reminds me of the time my friend reenacted the Planet of the Apes episode of The Simpsons in a park for me, and then when I actually saw it for the first time, it was...meh. Her version was wayyyyy better!

Our Word of the Week is:

POFLOALARAOTFPSFAA

With lack of oxygen due to laughing, only POFLOALARAOTFPSFAA can come out.

And for the sake of our safety, I am pasting below our gmail Lamb fuckery ANONYMOUSLY so none of us are attacked by Diaperward or a giant pacifier...

P.S. To each their own, peoples, to each their own...BUT, may I remind you --> I have recently quit smoking, so if I see anyone sucking their thumbs and wailing in the comments section about how I 'hurt' someone's feelings, I.Don't.Give.A.Feck.... Try me. Post something on a public site, be prepared for both love AND ridicule. And a lot of curiosity. Thank me for this...you'll have a shit ton more readers out of nowhere, baby *wink*

Email #1: Diaperward. Need I say more? I'm sorry. And I love you. Disclaimer: I need two week's notice should you guys decided not to be my friend anymore after reading this fic. P.S. BTW, THIS IS NOT SAFE FOR... ANYTHING.

Email #2: NOT LOOKING! NOT LOOKING! NOT LOOKING!

Email #3: Oh no, I will not be looking. I saw some of the tweets last night and fuck that! I love you but not gonna do it.

Email #4: Besides, I'm having to spend all my free time finding stories to rec this month... :)

Email #5: You will read this fic...*jedi mind trick*

I mean, how could you resist a fic with an a/n like: "DO NOT READ IF THE THOUGHT OF BELLA BREASTFEEDING EDWARD SQUICKS YOU OUT."

Or a line in the story, like: "The way he said Mommy and peepee (referring to his penis) almost made me cum right there."

Or a review, like: "I can't believe I'm saying this, but want more dirty dippers from Edward, his potty training, and deffinately ALL aspects of pregnant play! (Including the wet and dirty panties)" ... Um... WAT. O_O

Email #6: Well, one chapter in, and I can tell the rest of you to run for your fucking life.

Email #7: I wish you were there last night to give me that advice. Lol.

Email #8: You sucker! I AM NOT READING IT! NOT NOT NOT NOT! I just found a nice little E/B AH fic, and that's where I'll be all day. I mean, when I'm not working...

Email #9: This fic is an E/B AH fic... JS.

Email #10: Awww fuck no! Ain't gonna happen.

Email #11: Absolutely NOOOOO!!! Bad enough I read so much of OUAV! Diaperward, and that stuff? Eewww!!! No.

Email #12: MY E/B fic has NO diapers, or breastfeeding. The nipples involved are used for sexual play. Or they will be, if the story ever gets to that point. I would say everybody is an adult, but they're not. Its called "Age of Consent" And I feel guilty enough reading it. NOT READING YOUR DIAPER FIC. NOT NOT NOT NOT!

Email #13: Dude... You guys should be glad you don't follow the same feed I had on Twitter. That shit was EVERYWHERE last night. For the record, I'm not a sick person. I'm not normal, but I'm not THAT abnormal.

Email #14: I saw bits and pieces on twitter - enough to know I was NOT going to read it.

Email #15: I feel the need to protect your mentality. Bella's all hot and botherd while in active labor. Yeah. And licking her own fingers and shit. The FUCKING end. But there's 9 more chapters...

Email #16: No worries, I took one for the team... An hour that I'll never get back...

Email #17: AHHHH!!! I can't unsee that! I need a shower, eww!

Email #18: Well, 'they' do say a good orgasm will speed things along while you're in labor. A friend of mine who worked in Labor/delivery in an inner-city hospital said they constantly had to pull the males off the females during delivery. Like to see my hubs try that - not.

Email #19: I'm on my lunch, i've just pulled out the phone and i'm going to read a chapter... *pinches nose and dives into cesspool*

Email #20: EwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwActive labour horniness? Yeah. Right. Ewwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww!

Email #21: DON'T DO IT!!!!!! Don't Open it! And I'm not saying I was horny! I'm saying I've heard that! I can't imagine wanting to do anything but kill the person responsible for the pain!

Email #22: WTF? How on earth could a man get horny watching his woman deliver? No. No no no nononononononononononononononononononononononononon. No. And me? He'll be lucky if he gets any AFTER the delivery. At least for a while.

Email #23: Yeah, between XXX's and my reaction while reading it, we had people running away from twitter...Screaming...

Email #24: A/N at the end of chapter 10:

"I did something naughty the other day… I bought myself a pacifier from the drugstore and sucked on it while I… you know, made love to myself. Call me weird, but I loved it. I guess I do have a bit of a baby fetish. Have you ever done something like that? Worn a diaper, peed your pants, sucked on a paci? It'd be nice to know I'm not the only one… and you can be totally anonymous, remember!"

... Uhhhh... Yeah.

Email #25: Am I going to have to block you?

Email #26: *zips mouth shut*

Email #27: .............................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................

Email #28: Jeebus, I just can't stop talking. I'm going back to sleep.
But I'm scared. I may end up dreaming about a breastfeeding Edward with soiled diapers.

Email #29: Love button...Gaping canal...It's hilarious! I can't see for tears rolling down my face - i needed a good laugh lol! *ROLFLMFAO* *dons the biohazard suit and dives in to chapter two*

Email #30: You are a masochist.

Email #31: I need to balance out my karma, things have gone too well this week ha ha!

Email #32: Woah! I'm in the middle of the psycho-logists advice... and just... What. The. FUCK? Sweet lord! We need to find this person and have them deprogrammed pronto! The AN's are also a thing of beauty - i'm tempted to rewrite my next chapter in its style, because someone is going to need some comforting after what i've written, so maybe some breastfeeding can go in as a comfort mechanism... hmmmm...

POFTOALARAONTPSFAA (passes out from lack of air laughing and rolling around on the floor, please send for an ambulance)

And a WotW was born, ladies and gents!

POFLOALARAOTFPSFAA

Email #33: That's it. I'm reading the rest.

Email #34: Sick. You're all SICK masochistic fucks. Tell me how it ends.

Email #35: Mid labour she demands sex and gets on all fours... how can you refuse THAT! *blinkblinkblink POFLOALARAOTFPSFAA*

p.s yeah, i'mma send that shit. POFLOALARAOTFPSFAA, POFLOALARAOTFPSFAA, POFLOALARAOTFPSFAA, POFLOALARAOTFPSFAA, POFLOALARAOTFPSFAA, POFLOALARAOTFPSFAA, POFLOALARAOTFPSFAA, POFLOALARAOTFPSFAA, POFLOALARAOTFPSFAA, POFLOALARAOTFPSFAA, POFLOALARAOTFPSFAA, POFLOALARAOTFPSFAA, POFLOALARAOTFPSFAA, POFLOALARAOTFPSFAA, POFLOALARAOTFPSFAA, POFLOALARAOTFPSFAA, POFLOALARAOTFPSFAA, POFLOALARAOTFPSFAA, POFLOALARAOTFPSFAA, POFLOALARAOTFPSFAA, POFLOALARAOTFPSFAA, POFLOALARAOTFPSFAA, POFLOALARAOTFPSFAA, POFLOALARAOTFPSFAA, POFLOALARAOTFPSFAA, POFLOALARAOTFPSFAA, POFLOALARAOTFPSFAA, POFLOALARAOTFPSFAA, POFLOALARAOTFPSFAA, POFLOALARAOTFPSFAA, POFLOALARAOTFPSFAA, POFLOALARAOTFPSFAA, POFLOALARAOTFPSFAA, POFLOALARAOTFPSFAA, POFLOALARAOTFPSFAA, POFLOALARAOTFPSFAA, POFLOALARAOTFPSFAA, POFLOALARAOTFPSFAA, POFLOALARAOTFPSFAA, POFLOALARAOTFPSFAA, POFLOALARAOTFPSFAA lol!

Email #36: Word of the week, that is all.

Email #37: Hands down, best non intentional comedy cannon use of "Google it" i've ever read. POFLOALARAOTFPSFAA to the power of POFLOALARAOTFPSFAA.

10 minutes of lunch left... how far can i get

Email #38: Oh i JUST learnt something! Home births are ok as long as you have enough sanitary napkins *files that gem of knowledge away and eyes up the stack of napkins left over from lunch... maybe i can wrap those for that baby shower coming up...*

Email #39: BHAhhhhHhhhahhhahahahaha! *Runs to Walmart, and stocks up on Equate SuperAbsorbant Overnighters, cuz they never run out of those leaky bastards.*

Email #40: Chapter 8. Multitasking FTW. POFLOALARAOTFPSFAA

Email #41: Chapter 8. Oh god. If you read nothing else, read chapter 8. I quote: "Seeing him cum like that - so hot and loud - made something akin to Disney World happen in my panties"

POFLOALARAOTFPSFAAPOFLOALARAOTFPSFAAPOFLOALARAOTFPSFAAPOFLOALARAOTFPSFAAPOFLOALARAOTFPSFAAPOFLOALARAOTFPSFAAPOFLOALARAOTFPSFAAPOFLOALARAOTFPSFAAPOFLOALARAOTFPSFAAPOFLOALARAOTFPSFAAPOFLOALARAOTFPSFAAPOFLOALARAOTFPSFAAPOFLOALARAOTFPSFAAPOFLOALARAOTFPSFAAPOFLOALARAOTFPSFAAPOFLOALARAOTFPSFAAPOFLOALARAOTFPSFAAPOFLOALARAOTFPSFAAPOFLOALARAOTFPSFAAPOFLOALARAOTFPSFAAPOFLOALARAOTFPSFAAPOFLOALARAOTFPSFAAPOFLOALARAOTFPSFAAPOFLOALARAOTFPSFAAPOFLOALARAOTFPSFAAPOFLOALARAOTFPSFAAPOFLOALARAOTFPSFAAPOFLOALARAOTFPSFAAPOFLOALARAOTFPSFAAPOFLOALARAOTFPSFAAPOFLOALARAOTFPSFAAPOFLOALARAOTFPSFAAPOFLOALARAOTFPSFAAPOFLOALARAOTFPSFAAPOFLOALARAOTFPSFAAPOFLOALARAOTFPSFAAPOFLOALARAOTFPSFAAPOFLOALARAOTFPSFAAPOFLOALARAOTFPSFAAPOFLOALARAOTFPSFAAPOFLOALARAOTFPSFAAPOFLOALARAOTFPSFAAPOFLOALARAOTFPSFAAPOFLOALARAOTFPSFAAPOFLOALARAOTFPSFAAPOFLOALARAOTFPSFAAPOFLOALARAOTFPSFAAPOFLOALARAOTFPSFAAPOFLOALARAOTFPSFAAPOFLOALARAOTFPSFAAPOFLOALARAOTFPSFAAPOFLOALARAOTFPSFAAPOFLOALARAOTFPSFAAPOFLOALARAOTFPSFAAPOFLOALARAOTFPSFAAPOFLOALARAOTFPSFAAPOFLOALARAOTFPSFAAPOFLOALARAOTFPSFAAPOFLOALARAOTFPSFAAPOFLOALARAOTFPSFAAPOFLOALARAOTFPSFAAPOFLOALARAOTFPSFAAPOFLOALARAOTFPSFAAPOFLOALARAOTFPSFAAPOFLOALARAOTFPSFAAPOFLOALARAOTFPSFAAPOFLOALARAOTFPSFAAPOFLOALARAOTFPSFAAPOFLOALARAOTFPSFAAPOFLOALARAOTFPSFAAPOFLOALARAOTFPSFAAPOFLOALARAOTFPSFAAPOFLOALARAOTFPSFAAPOFLOALARAOTFPSFAAPOFLOALARAOTFPSFAAPOFLOALARAOTFPSFAAPOFLOALARAOTFPSFAAPOFLOALARAOTFPSFAAPOFLOALARAOTFPSFAAPOFLOALARAOTFPSFAAPOFLOALARAOTFPSFAAPOFLOALARAOTFPSFAAPOFLOALARAOTFPSFAAPOFLOALARAOTFPSFAAPOFLOALARAOTFPSFAA

Email #42: I take it back. It's all about chapter 9. "Wearing diapers makes me feel... safe, I guess. The warmth...the wetness.. it's almost sexual." I just have no response to that.

p.s i'm currently hiding in our work library doing "research" shhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh! ;)

Email #43: I want disney world in my pants. Now.

Email #44: I can retreat from the library now... i've finished and i feel a little empty inside, and i have the strangest need to fill an industrial sized vat with bleach and bathe in it for quite some time. Although maybe i just need to take a leaf out of the authors notebook and go buy a pacifier to comfort myself...

*shudders*